Feisty

<p><strong style=color: rgba(15 17 17 1)>I'm not too proud to admit that finding Mr. Right involves swiping right. Right? Welcome to dating in avocado toastland.</strong></p><p><br></p><p><span style=color: rgba(15 17 17 1)>Here I am on my first blind date ever courtesy of a smartphone app and my two annoying best friends.</span></p><p><br></p><p><span style=color: rgba(15 17 17 1)>So what is Chris Fletch Fletcher doing walking across the room looking at his phone like he's pattern matching a picture to find a real person he's never met before?</span></p><p><br></p><p><span style=color: rgba(15 17 17 1)>Oh.</span></p><p><br></p><p><span style=color: rgba(15 17 17 1)>Oh </span><em style=color: rgba(15 17 17 1)>no.</em></p><p><br></p><p><span style=color: rgba(15 17 17 1)>The guy I drop-kicked in seventh grade cannot be my blind date. The guy who earned me this infernal nickname.</span></p><p><br></p><p><span style=color: rgba(15 17 17 1)>That's right.</span></p><p><br></p><p><em style=color: rgba(15 17 17 1)>Feisty.</em></p><p><br></p><p><span style=color: rgba(15 17 17 1)>It was bad enough that last month all my old kickboxing training came in handy when a disgruntled noncustodial dad invaded my preschool class and tried to take one of my kids without permission.</span></p><p><br></p><p><span style=color: rgba(15 17 17 1)>That ended with news coverage of the closed-circuit video that parents saw in real time as I beat him up and pinned his neck to the ground while waiting for police to respond.</span></p><p><br></p><p><span style=color: rgba(15 17 17 1)>We won't mention the part where I thrust my arm into the air in a power stance and uh...</span></p><p><br></p><p><span style=color: rgba(15 17 17 1)>Roared.</span></p><p><br></p><p><span style=color: rgba(15 17 17 1)>Hey. HEY! Don't judge me. I protected those kids. And the kid most in danger was Fletch's nephew.</span></p><p><br></p><p><span style=color: rgba(15 17 17 1)>The same Fletch who just now noticed me sitting here.</span></p><p><br></p><p><span style=color: rgba(15 17 17 1)>Being noticed is bad.</span></p><p><br></p><p><span style=color: rgba(15 17 17 1)>Being his dating app match is even worse.</span></p><p><br></p><p><span style=color: rgba(15 17 17 1)>Why?</span></p><p><br></p><p><span style=color: rgba(15 17 17 1)>Because no matter how hard I've tried to avoid him since high school every time I see him I have the same reaction.</span></p><p><br></p><p><span style=color: rgba(15 17 17 1)>I wish I'd never kicked him.</span></p><p><br></p><p><span style=color: rgba(15 17 17 1)>I wish instead that I'd let him kiss me.</span></p><p><br></p><p><span style=color: rgba(15 17 17 1)>Which it looks like he's trying to do.</span></p><p><br></p><p><strong style=color: rgba(15 17 17 1)>Right now.</strong></p>