This book is an autobiography of my experiences in combat during the Vietnam War. At those controversial times I had to reinvent myself and adjust to every unique situation not only for my survival but also for my comrades. Many times I used humor at critical times. Was I a clown fool survivor or all of the above? All I know as a leader in combat I could not show fear or become too emotional even as men were being torn apart from shrapnel or bullets. I was expected to keep my composure and a clear head to have a chance to come back alive at the same time accomplish our mission. Trust me I was not any different than the other men but I had to act like I was. I still had to find ways to vent my emotions. In Nam one-liners and sick humor became my repertoire. Some new guys thought I was crazy at times which was okay as long as I could maintain control.