<p>Ruth Poniarski set out to find the ideal friend and the&nbsp;perfect mate but what she encountered were spells&nbsp;of paranoia extreme anxiety and hallucinations. Trying&nbsp;to navigate her cyclic malady she undertook a rigorous&nbsp;architectural program in search of her passion. What she&nbsp;discovered on her journey is captured brilliantly in this&nbsp;unflinchingly honest memoir.</p>