Love's Virtues

<p>Bonding Eros with virtue is neither unrealistic nor naive contends Mike Martin. On the contrary it's practical even pragmatic. Virtues serve to focus structure and even define erotic love. In particular caring respect faithfulness honesty fairness wisdom and gratitude are central to successful long-term relationships.</p><p><i>In Love's Virtues</i> Martin takes a look at why moral values enhance and solidify erotic and marital relationships. In the process he challenges the widespread cynicism about marriage while remaining sensitive to the innumerable problems confronting couples. His approach to marital love is both traditional and modern. Traditional by seeking to understand the moral significance of relationships based on long-term and lifelong commitments to love. Modern by proceeding within a pluralist framework that affirms many kinds of erotic love depending on the ideals partners embrace and their interpretations (within limits) of love's virtues.</p><p>Marriages as Martin understands them are moral relationships that involve sexual desires (at some time during the relationship) and are based on long-term commitment whether or not those commitments are formally sanctioned by legal or religious authorities. In this sense marriages are not restricted by the law religious tenets or the partners' sexual orientation.</p><p>Drawing on literature psychology and philosophy--from Plato and Shakespeare to Ingmar Bergman Robert Bellah and Carol Gilligan; from Tolstoy and D.H. Lawrence to Erich Fromm Erica Jong and Alice Walker--Martin reminds us that virtuous erotic love is a way to morally value another person. Understanding love as a virtue-structured way to appreciate others he illustrates is itself a step toward renewing marital faith.</p>