No One Heard My Cry

When I close my eyes I can see that old house. I walk up to the door hoping he's not there but when I reach for the knob it opens there he is pulling me in and locking the door behind me. The trip to his bedroom seems like eternity. I lay there with my eyes and fist closed tight. I can smell the alcohol on his breath. I pray to God for it to be over; when it's finally over I walk to the bathroom to clean myself up. It feels like a fire burning between my legs. I run cold water on some tissue to comfort me. I slowly open the door there he is motioning for me to go sit on the couch when I get to the couch he covers me up with a blanket. I pray that one day this nightmare will end for twelve years I didn't know what it was like to sleep at night. My brother Trevor would come in my room and keep me up half the night and after school daddy would have sex with me as soon as momma went to work. I walked around in shorts so he could have me whenever he wanted. I couldn't wait for momma's days off; she didn't talk to me but I could sleep at night without being scared to close my eyes. I don't know why I never told anyone maybe it's because then the abuse would become real or maybe I cried and no one heard my cry or was the pain so bad I couldn't cry out loud. I thought about running away but where would I go we lived forty-five miles from the nearest town he would have killed me by the time the police arrived. I loved going to school it was the only place I could find safety for seven hours of my day I could pretend that my life was normal. I always got nervous when three o'clock came; the only thing I looked forward to was the long bus ride home. I was the first to be picked up and the last to be dropped off. When the bus turned that corner and came to a complete stop my heart would pound because behind those doors was my living nightmare.