Seeking Shelter Seeking Safety

<p>The idea for this book came into my mind as I was writing the final chapters of my second book <strong><em>Making Meaning: Clay Therapy with Children and Adolescents</em></strong>. For as I was reminiscing on the clinical cases I have been privileged to work with I realised how often my work had taken me into the essential realm of parent and child pairings; family work and group work. And as there is still so little written about working with clay in therapy let alone clay therapy with families and various groupings it seemed timely to begin sharing my clinical experiences in this specialist field.</p><p></p><p>When reflecting on clinical work with families and groups I never cease to be amazed at how quickly much goodwill and cooperation develops between the participants. Simply put it is my belief that most human beings want to be wanted liked and accepted. I use the word simply though knowing how difficult this is to achieve at times. Why should this be though? Again simply put we all seek to have our needs sometimes met through necessity and sometimes met through desires and yet these needs and desires cannot possibly be the same as one of our family members or classmates neither peers nor colleagues. How wonderful it is though when our needs and desires are similar - where mutuality is afforded with respect.</p><p></p><p>Writing this book began in earnest when I was visiting Buenos Aires. I came across a monument - El Obelisco at the centre of this magnificent city. The Obelisk was erected centrally</p><p>where cross cultural aspects are in abundance in the vibrant city that was born from a hybrid of immigrants from Spain and Italy who were searching for a better life in another continent. Walking around this hugely cosmopolitan city I heard many languages spoken and found myself wrapped up in one of my favourite pastimes; that of 'people watching'. I saw young couples entwined I saw mothers with crying children I saw fathers hurrying along with their young sons I saw workers business people tourists and travellers but what I really saw were people who are someone's daughter sister mother aunt grandmother or great grandmother son brother father grandfather and great grandfather. Always - well nearly always as human beings we veer towards others we absolutely need to belong somewhere. Fundamentally because we need others for survival and safety; our reptilian brains propel us to seek others. In Darwinian terms to survive we need safety warmth and food usually by being with others and we also need shelter from fear and the elements.</p><p></p><p>In Europe in Africa in Asia and many other parts of the world the same is still taking place as refugees flee from their countries that are in conflict. This seems to have been the way of human beings over the millennia and across the globe - people on the move trying to escape being marginalised living in fear and or violence in search of safety and shelter and looking for a different way of life; a better existence.</p><p></p><p>Storytellers and poets the world over have written about family life; the need to belong the need to be accepted and the place to feel safe where there is shelter from outside worries and woes. There are times though when this is not the case within families. Instead strife and fear are more the norm and the shelter we come to call home is not safe. But we have such an overarching drive to find safety and shelter this becomes an incredibly motivating factor in how lives are lived.</p>