Soulmate Setbacks

<p><strong>Have you found your soulmate yet? Do you recall that special moment when your eyes first met?</strong></p><p><strong>Sigh... I don't</strong></p><p><br></p><p>What I <em>do</em> remember is facing off against a feisty chipmunk who wanted fertility assistance the Spirits of the Damned trying to infiltrate my home and going six-rounds with a colossal wolf spider - topless. If that's not enough I'm still left to contend with the contaminated dating pool where I'm drowning in shallow frigid water.</p><p><br></p><p>So what exactly do a guy who I'd swear was a cannibal a grown man dressed like a banana and the proudly self-proclaimed Beat Your Meat Specialist have in common? Spoiler alert: they have all somehow managed to find <em>me</em> despite my efforts to hide in a hole under my porch from this dating dumpster fire.</p><p><br></p><p>Just when you thought one woman's savage search for a soulmate couldn't possibly offer any more insanity I bring you Confessions II. More dating mishaps and silly life scenarios more off-the-wall girl chat more naughty sexploits... but still the same number of suitable prospects. (That number was zero in case you've forgotten.)</p><p><br></p><p><strong>*Mature Content</strong></p>