Tales of a Mermaid Gone Over The Deep End

Advance praise (payback) for Teresa Fischtner: Well this is a little embarrassing. I didnt actually read the WHOLE book but its probably pretty good. Im not sure what she said about me but you should know-SHE shot me in the back on my 19th birthday! - Ronny Fischtner (authors son)I love my mom and I love MOST of this book. It should be noted that my bowling has improved Ive given up hockey accounting is for nerds pancakes is food for super heroes and no one needs to count how many boyfriends Ive had.- Malyn Fischtner (authors daughter)Im pleased to be the source of so much humour for my wife. I just wish she didnt feel the need to publish it.- Ron Fischtner (authors husband) It was the last class of the evening that I was teaching and we were doing our stretches and at the surface of the water I noticed a single floating nipple happily bobbing away on its own. Unsure if its owner was still in the water I quietly asked the nearest lady Excuse me could you just pass me that nipple over your right shoulder?There I held a lovely C-cup breast that went rogue. I made posters for the lost breast (seriously I made missing boob posters). No one claimed her. I introduced her to all the instructors but no one recognized her (honestly they all look the same after a few years at the pool). No one ever claimed Betty (yes we gave her a name). Betty stayed on the teachers table in our special little box for a long time. Eventually like all good boobs she wrinkled up lost her bounce and sagged lower and lower in the box until we all forgot how much fun she was when we first found her.This is a feel-good book of true short stories about me my family friends and my aquafit business Over the Deep End. We all have stories to share and the true ones are always the best. Im sharing some of my most vulnerable moments some of my greatest moments and some of my saddest. Hopefully in one story or another you find something way better than me-you might find you. We all have a story and a different way to tell it. I hope telling my stories helps you tell some of your own.