The Platinum-Level Transluminal Vacation Package of Your Dreams

<p><strong>Lloyd Heller sells luxury vacations in alternate timelines.</strong> If he can close one last sale in the next 24 hours he gets his own vacation package the best of them all a real career topper: the platinum-level vacation package of his dreams.</p><p>Too bad the secret science Heller uses to jump timelines is just whacky magic dreamed up by a bored deity. Heller doesn't know it but his company his product-his entire career-is a divine prank. When all the tech explodes in a speed yoga accident the whole shebang goes into ground-hog mode. The strain on reality threatens to turn Heller and the rest of the known galaxy into a scorched field of low-grade aquarium gravel if somebody doesn't fix it pronto.</p><p>Actually racing against time Heller does everything in his power to stop the ground-hogging reset reality save the world score that platinum vacation package and maybe against all odds fall in love </p><p> </p><p><strong><em>(Please note: novel includes sentient phones recursive reality T.V. vacuum-induced full-body fart scenes Gerry Rafferty songs transgressive blasphemy spider dogs naked old people and endless cthulian dread.)</em></strong></p>