I was never able to ride the Coney Island roller coaster called The Cyclone but my life on solid ground was full of many ups and downs. I always had a job sometimes 2 jobs yet my bills were more than my paychecks.<p>I had attended church on a regular basis. I had lived with two husbands and raised three children but poverty and pain had always taken over my life. I had been taught to never question God but the pain became so severe that I had to find out what was the matter. Only God could give me the real answers.<p>The Children of Israel walked around in the desert for 40 years never understanding their purpose. I was spared.