White Roses In A Dream: Traits Patterns and Action Plans

While writing this sequel to my first book MANipulated Into Fear There Is Always A Pattern I couldnt understand how I was able to live the dark side of life while others perceived me as living a happy normal life. I was devastated at the thought of being unemployed now and allowing my relationship with an abuser to affect my family and me and our lives. I began to realize that I too had traits patterns and action plans just like Rolf and that there was always a pattern of abuse within families. Irrational thoughts entered my mind and I began contemplating ending Rolfs life before he ended mine. In the same vein if I didnt murder Rolf I felt the need for me to take my own life to stop living in fear because of Rolf. I was hoping that there was a way for me to control my fear when one day I saw white roses and knew that they symbolized new beginnings. Several months later I left to go on vacation to Germany and hoped that I would be able to leave my feelings of fear behind. Sometimes one never knows what to expect on a trip. There were times when I felt like Cinderella had quite an adventure and wished that I had brought my weapon for protection. When I returned home something very unexpected happened to me. I had a relationship with a man that seemed to be surreal. One can only continue to pray for white roses in a dream and hope for a new beginning with their life. It doesnt always have to be a dream!